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submitted by /u/katm8086 to r/awfuleverything [link] [comments] |
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Monday, February 28, 2022
Please, a reminder not to target Russian Americans making a living or even just Russian citizens :(
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Procrastination is like masturbation.
It feels good while you do it. But at the end of the day, you're just fucking yourself.
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Meta: We are now prohibiting Russian state media from running ads or monetizing
Article URL: https://twitter.com/ngleicher/status/1497417241947607043
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30503375
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
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Banned from Swift
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submitted by /u/Sampo to r/ProgrammerHumor [link] [comments] |
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I can't believe I was arrested for impersonating politicians
I was literally in my office doing nothing...
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Sunday, February 27, 2022
Extra large condoms...
A beautiful woman approaches a pharmacist and asks, “Do you have extra large condoms?” The pharmacist replies, “Yes, aisle 11.” The blonde goes to the isle. But about 30 minutes later she is still looking at the condoms. The pharmacist calls over to her, “Do you need some help?” The woman replies, “No, I’m just waiting for somebody to buy some.”
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Wordlexpr – compile-time Wordle in C++20
Article URL: https://vittorioromeo.info/index/blog/wordlexpr.html
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30491143
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
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Pokemon Scarlet and Violet announced. Coming later this year.
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submitted by /u/Turbostrider27 to r/NintendoSwitch [link] [comments] |
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Which one?
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submitted by /u/efwjvnewiupgier9ng to r/memes [link] [comments] |
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Science puns make me numb
But math puns make me number.
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Saturday, February 26, 2022
Minimal English
Article URL: https://intranet.secure.griffith.edu.au/schools-departments/natural-semantic-metalanguage/minimal-english
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30481036
Points: 4
# Comments: 1
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He thought it was merely a plastic cone.
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submitted by /u/WritesUaSong to r/IdiotsInCars [link] [comments] |
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Why are the police killing gingers?
Because orange is the new black.
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Live Ukrainian TV Channels on YouTube
Article URL: https://www.mailwatch.co.uk/viewtopic.php?t=249&start=90
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30480347
Points: 3
# Comments: 0
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Walmart.
An elderly man gets a job as a Greeter at Walmart, a very overweight woman comes in with two obnoxious kids, they are shouting and screaming, throwing things about, running around the store causing mayhem, the Greeter, walks over to the woman, encountering a strong smell of Body odour and cheap perfume as he did so, He said to the woman, “ what delightful children, are they twins” The woman turns to him and yells at him “ He’s 8 and the other one’s 5. Why do you think they are twins, you blind or summin?” The man “said, I can’t believe anyone would shag you twice.”
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Friday, February 25, 2022
Introduction to Terraform
Article URL: https://techmutation.substack.com/p/intro-tf
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30470616
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
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Found this at the checkout of a plumbing supply place. Seriously?
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submitted by /u/Bigbigjeffy to r/antiwork [link] [comments] |
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Shout out to the luckiest timeline 4 WP
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submitted by /u/apocolypstick to r/WhitePeopleTwitter [link] [comments] |
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Our fur guardian, Kyiv, today. #StandWithUkraine 🇺🇦
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submitted by /u/greatabstractor to r/cats [link] [comments] |
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Jeez
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submitted by /u/toetenaufverlangen1 to r/trashy [link] [comments] |
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What do women say to men with big dicks?
Had a feeling you would have to check the answer small Weiner
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Thursday, February 24, 2022
Turning Neovim into a Full-Fledged Code Editor with Lua
Article URL: https://mattermost.com/blog/turning-neovim-into-a-full-fledged-code-editor-with-lua/
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30458577
Points: 2
# Comments: 0
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Why are the stars not magnified in the telescope? (2000)
Article URL: https://books.google.com/books/about/Astronomy_for_Entertainment.html?hl=de&id=2Sc_eaR9c9UC
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30458572
Points: 1
# Comments: 1
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Why is Russia attacking Ukraine?
submitted by /u/Shourya2009 to r/TooAfraidToAsk
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Read More...
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Ukrainian President Zelenskyy's heartbreaking, defiant speech to the Russian people [English subtitles]
![Ukrainian President Zelenskyy's heartbreaking, defiant speech to the Russian people [English subtitles]](https://external-preview.redd.it/wZzakhvp2pIBuWIG_XnMmHB5qfHLrqKM09TuvFdIcG8.png?width=640&crop=smart&auto=webp&s=86d970b948d26e3dc9a166a4d217ec5132edbf8b "Ukrainian President Zelenskyy's heartbreaking, defiant speech to the Russian people [English subtitles]") |
submitted by /u/itshimstarwarrior to r/Damnthatsinteresting [link] [comments] |
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There is a medieval town with a group of friars.
You know the ones, balding on top, fringe of hair, gray-robed religious folks. They are having a meeting to discuss the lack of donations to the church.
"Donations are at an all time low, it just isn't enough to support the church any more! Anyone have any ideas of how we could make more money?" says one.
"Well, I recently starting growing some flowers in my free time, maybe we could start growing more of those and open up some flower shops around town," says another.
They all agree this is a great idea and quickly open up a bunch of flowers shops around town with the not so clever title of "The Lord's Flowers". Business is going great!
So great in fact, that all the local florists in town are pretty upset about these friars trying to steal away their market. All the local florists meet together to discuss the issue. After an hour of heated debate, they decide they may have to take the low road to resolve the issue. They pool their funds together and send their bravest member to the dirtiest, sketchiest inn in town to find someone who can "take care of business" and remove these pesky friars.
The florist walks in and asks the innkeeper where we can find someone who can help "take care of business" *wink*. The innkeeper, no stranger to the dark dealings that happen in his establishment, immediately points him towards a large fellow named Hugh, sitting alone at a table in the corner.
"But whatever you do, don't make eye direct contact with him," warns the bartender.
Though the florist is the bravest of the bunch, this still rattles him a bit. He approaches Hugh's table carefully, all the while trying to not make eye contact.
"Uh, hey Hugh," he says, trying to glance anywhere else. "I'm with the florists in town and we've been having a little problem with the friars cutting into are market with their flower shops. I don't care how it's done, but we would be willing to compensate you generously if you removed them from the market." With this, he throws the bag of money on the table, while carefully staring at Hugh's left shoulder.
Hugh, the huge mountain of man on the other side of the table, takes the bag and counts its contents. After a brief pause, he growls "yeah, I'll take care of it".
Because everyone knows, only Hugh can prevent florist friars.
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Wednesday, February 23, 2022
Grandma killed my dog and everyone says she did nothing wrong
Throwaway since my family knows my account.
My grandma moved with me and my family two weeks ago since she was diagnosed with dementia and she couldn’t take her of herself anymore. She is normally a kind lady and lived all her life in a small village and has very traditional views on animals and how you treat them.
She often complained about my 7years old dog and how it should stay outside, protect the house and not stay inside with us cause she find it very unclean. My family usually let her speak and don’t give her much attention on the matter.
Last night it was late, she usually never sleeps and wonders the house aimlessly usually waking up someone to put her back in bed. Last night no one heard her, my dog was sleeping in the kitchen on its bed and was probably waken up by her, following her around. She decided alone to open the back door and let the pup outside, eventually forgiving about it in the freezing temperature.
I woke up to everyone muttering and my sister crying. They found it dead outside , clinging to the door. I got angry and started screaming at my grandma till my father came and slapped me, telling me she doesn’t know better and I’m lacking of respect. Both my parents started blaming me for even making her accountable of anything. My sibling are afraid of saying anything and now I’m filled with grief and anger. I can’t do anything and nothing will bring back my pup. I don’t even know what will make me feel better, she’ll never even say sorry to me. In her mind she may be totally fine while I can’t do anything but resent her and everyone else.
EDIT: people here are really cruel, I’m not saying I should put her on a stake. I just wish anyone would acknowledge my pain and not shroud it off saying “It’s not her fault”. Everyone’s acting like nothing happened, no one comforted me and everyone just accepted it.
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The last video game character you played as has to defend you against 1,000 zombies. Are you surviving?
Comment your character if you'd like.
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80s Girlfriend (and me) then and now
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submitted by /u/HoopieFrood to r/OldSchoolCool [link] [comments] |
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What does Jeff Bezos do before bed?
Puts his pajamazon.
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Golomb Ruler
Article URL: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Golomb_ruler
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30444668
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
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To flex
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submitted by /u/Sans____Undertale to r/therewasanattempt [link] [comments] |
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Tuesday, February 22, 2022
Thoughtful comment “now you’re just beautiful” made this lady’s day!
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submitted by /u/Fluid-Daydreamer to r/MadeMeSmile [link] [comments] |
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The boss calls in his best worker for a performance evaluation.
Everything goes well but at the end of the meeting, the worker says "I think you should give me a raise. I'll have you know there are three other companies who are after me."
The boss raises his brow and asks, "Who?"
The worker replies, "Electric, Gas, and Phone.."
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Convoy Crackdown – power to freeze bank accounts without trial or legal recourse
Article URL: https://thezvi.substack.com/p/convoy-crackdown
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30431820
Points: 19
# Comments: 0
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Proof versus potential: Why women must work harder to move up
Article URL: https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20220222-proof-verus-potential-problem
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30431809
Points: 1
# Comments: 1
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Trump-backed Truth Social tops Apple's app store charts
Article URL: https://www.cnbc.com/2022/02/22/trump-backed-truth-social-tops-apples-app-store-charts.html
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30431798
Points: 8
# Comments: 1
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Dear Meta: An Open Letter from Direct Response Advertisers
Article URL: https://www.foxwelldigital.com/blog/dear-meta-an-open-letter-from-direct-response-advertisers
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30431794
Points: 3
# Comments: 0
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Remembering Dr. Paul Farmer
Article URL: https://www.pih.org/article/remembering-dr-paul-farmer
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30431789
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
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Monday, February 21, 2022
Men, what would you think/do if your partner wants you to do a STDs test before any sexual experience ?
submitted by /u/Legal__Drug_Dealer_ to r/AskMen
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Read More...
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Fomir – a schema-first library for building forms
Article URL: https://github.com/forsigner/fomir
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30419237
Points: 3
# Comments: 0
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Show HN: Hershey sued us. We turned it into an NFT
Article URL: https://www.middaysquares.com/pages/chocolate-gone-crazy-nft-project
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30419212
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
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Why is it frowned upon for a white person to wear their hair in dreadlocks or cornrows, while black women can wear blonde, straightened wigs?
I assume I’m missing something, or am I not drawing the right conclusions.
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What do hillbillys do during halloween ?
They Pumpkin
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My wife always tells me that I treat my kid unfair. I don't even know which one she means.
Thomas, Jane or the fat and ugly one?
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Sunday, February 20, 2022
When my wife threatened a divorce because of my obsession with the Shrek soundtrack, I thought she was joking.
But then I saw her face
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Remove unused Python imports automatically
Article URL: https://github.com/hakancelik96/unimport
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30408204
Points: 2
# Comments: 0
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Which blogging platform should I use?
I am planning to start blogging but I'm still confused with choosing a blogging platform/CMS. A no code one or one which requires coding knowledge would be OK. What are you guys' suggestions. Need a hand with that. What about WordPress, Weebly, Webflow, Ghost, Medium? Is there anything other than that which you found cool?
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30408187
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
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Snowboarding for Geeks: An Ultimate Guide (2018)
Article URL: https://www.xfive.co/blog/snowboarding-ultimate-guide/
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30408158
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
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Ask HN: Do You Own a Dictionary?
I mainly rely on digital dictionaries — Google’s automatic definition feature, and sometimes specific sites — to define words. I recently wondered: am I missing something by not having a physical dictionary to flip through?
Do you own a dictionary? Why? Which one(s)? Do you refer to it often?
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30408121
Points: 2
# Comments: 4
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First Gene Therapy for Tay-Sachs Disease Successfully Given to Two Children
Article URL: https://theconversation.com/first-gene-therapy-for-tay-sachs-disease-successfully-given-to-two-children-176870
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30408104
Points: 2
# Comments: 0
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The wife asked what would happen if we added smoking weed to our sex
I answered : “489”
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Saturday, February 19, 2022
Why can't we shut down the world for 2 weeks to end covid?
Why can't the world just blank out for 2 weeks and solve the covid pandemic? No bills, no production, no movement (except those in hospitals and have emergency services still available).
Would a world-wide pause destroy the entire world for that long? Is money a driving force that is keeping the pandemic around? Could it even be enforced?
I don't consider myself to be an ignorant person, but I can't seem to wrap my head around why we can't just end it.
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Joe had suffered from really bad headaches for the last 20 years. He eventually decides to go and see a Doctor.
The Doctor said, 'Joe, the good news is I can cure your headaches. The bad news is that it will require castration. You have a very rare condition which causes your testicles to press on your spine and the pressure creates one hell of a headache.
The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicles.'
Joe was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live for.
He had no choice but to go under the knife. The surgery cost him $15,000.
When he left the hospital, he was without a headache for the first time in 20 years, but he felt like he was missing an important part of himself.
As he walked down the street, he realized that he felt like a different person. He could make a new beginning and live a new life.
He saw a Men's clothing store and thought, 'That's what I need... A new suit.'
He entered the shop and told the salesman, 'I'd like a new suit.'
The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, 'Let's see... size 44 long.
Joe laughed, 'That's right, how did you know?'
'Been in the business 60 years!' the tailor said.
Joe tried on the suit it fitted perfectly.
As Joe admired himself in the mirror, the salesman asked, 'How about a new shirt?'
Joe thought for a moment and then said, 'Sure.'
The salesman eyed Joe and said, 'Let's see, 34 sleeves and 16-1/2 neck.'
Joe was surprised, 'That's right, how did you know?'
'Been in the business 60 years.'
Joe tried the shirt and it fitted perfectly.
Joe walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, 'How about some new underwear?'
Joe thought for a moment and said, 'Sure.'
The salesman said, 'Let's see... size 36'.
Joe laughed, 'Ah ha! I got you! I've worn a size 34 since I was 18 years old.'
The salesman shook his head, 'You can't wear a size 34. A size 34 would press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a Headache.'
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One Voice Detector to Rule Them All
Article URL: https://thegradient.pub/one-voice-detector-to-rule-them-all/
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30399163
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
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Leaning on shelf
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submitted by /u/_ThePaperball to r/instant_regret [link] [comments] |
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Two blonde robbers were robbing a hotel.
The first one said - I hear sirens. Jump.
The other replied - But we are on the 13th floor.
The first one yelled - This is no time to be superstitious.
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Friday, February 18, 2022
Tech Companies Face a Fresh Crisis: Hiring
Article URL: https://www.nytimes.com/2022/02/16/magazine/tech-company-recruiters.html
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30390161
Points: 2
# Comments: 0
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She’s a hero
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submitted by /u/bradhrad to r/WhitePeopleTwitter [link] [comments] |
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A history degree is useless
There's no future in it.
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Delete Facebook. Permanent Account Deletion
Article URL: https://deletefacebook.com
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30389606
Points: 2
# Comments: 0
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Show HN: A Theory of Anxiety Conditions
Hi HN,
I ve been in this community for a while now and have a huge amount of respect for the people and the forum so I wanted to post this here.
This is a pretty random one and I wish to emphasise from the very beginning this is not medical advice and is only based on what I saw in myself. It is therefore entirely up to anyone kind enough to have a read to decide whether they think what I describe makes any sense for them. If people have comments or thoughts I think it would be quite cool to use the GitHub issues as a forum for discussion and collecting peoples’ feedback.
TLDR
When I was diagnosed with an anxiety condition I thought about the specifics of what was going on in my mind probably an unhealthy amount. I wrote it down, then rewrote it many many times and it then sat in my draw for a few years, and I ve finally decided I should put it online just in case it helps someone else.
I believe we have largely overlooked the possibility of using introspection of one’s own consciousness to gain scientific understanding and theories of the casual mechanism involved in anxiety conditions. I propose that when I study my own consciousness there appear to be useful abstractions (many of which we already allude to in common language) and that formalising the system described by these abstractions appears to be useful for understanding the casual mechanism underlying the anxiety conditions I experienced.
At it’s most basic the casual mechanism I propose relates to the existence (under certain conditions / beliefs) of a feedback loop between those feelings that are partially endogenous and our thoughts (under the definitions of these terms laid out in the essay). Whilst I can only analyse myself, this casual mechanism also appears to be consistent with and explain many of the clinical characteristics of the anxiety conditions described in the DSM. I believe it also sheds light on the current successful therapeutic approaches as well as their failings. However, as emphasised throughout, this is, and can only ever be a theory about me, and can only ever be falsified on an individual basis. Therefore, I would love to hear other peoples’ opinions on whether this description of my conscious experience and the theory I propose is also true for them.
Github issues - https://github.com/A-Theory-Of-Anxiety-Conditions/A-Theory-O...
PS apologies for the website I m no web developer
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30389598
Points: 2
# Comments: 0
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Thursday, February 17, 2022
Do you know what it’s like to be a comedian with ADHD?
Why is this font so small?
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Stripe Treasury/Issuance Alternatives?
https://ift.tt/7j3XCgd
I was very excited about it, but turns out you can't use it for one of the most interesting use cases imo, personal banking.
Are there other platforms that would allow me to form a "virtual banking provider"?
- Being able to issue people cards for personal use - Assign those cards to individual ACH-enabled accounts
I'd especially love a platform that doesn't require sales calls to get started since it seems like they tend to be tuned for established players.
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30377652
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
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Nhtsa Begins Preliminary Investigation into Tesla “Phantom Breaking” [pdf]
Article URL: https://static.nhtsa.gov/odi/inv/2022/INOA-PE22002-4385.PDF
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30377633
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
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3 Minutes of Mindy Kaling bragging about sexually harassing another actor; illustrating the huge double-standards of how women are allowed to talk about men
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submitted by /u/stingymaggot to r/videos [link] [comments] |
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Chat Bots
Has anyone ever used a chat bot and been happy with the interaction? Every time I encounter one online it just really annoys me. Perhaps I'm just not the target market, but usually whenever I actually try chatting to someone on a website (or call their phone for that matter) I have exhausted all ways of accessing the information and I need a human to perform some action for me and the chat bot is literally just in the way.
Part of me thinks perhaps some people can't search the web and need a chat bot but another part of me thinks that it's just a (futile) attempt by companies to reduce the cost of supporting their products.
My own experience trialing website chat also backs this up. We tried chat to see if customers would be more likely to convert after chatting with us. Nobody wanted to chat with us and the only customers we spoke to were existing customers who previously would have emailed us to achieve what they wanted to achieve. My learning from that is that people would just rather do the thing online without ever interacting with a human.
So are chat bots just another way to extract money from large corporations at their (and our) expense or is there actual value in them ?
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30377019
Points: 1
# Comments: 1
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A woman was taking an afternoon nap
When she woke up, she told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace. What do you think it means?"
"You'll know tonight," he said.
That evening, the man came home with a small package and gave it to his wife. Delighted, she opened it to find a book entitled "The Meaning of Dreams."
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Wednesday, February 16, 2022
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/n5fs9ijaglk81.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.redd.it/vs5q144zaek81.jpg){kind=link}
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When will India be held responsible for their scam call centers?
Individual people on YouTube have done more for people against India scam call centers than our own governments.
Scam call centers are stealing money from our most vulnerable citizens and destroying generational wealth.
At this point, scam call centers are “legitimate careers” for some people in India and are essentially office buildings.
I’m “attacked” by scammers several times A DAY. Phone calls and text messages, all in an attempt to gain access to my life/money and destroy me financially.
These calls have been going on for years. YEARS!!! In my line of work, I get called from strange numbers all the time. If I don’t pick up, I could miss an opportunity.
So I’m asking. When will India be held responsible for their scam call centers?
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Asshat in Semi
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