Article URL: https://lettersfromtheporch.wordpress.com/2009/09/26/on-the-deferred-life-plan-an-introduction-to-randy-komisar/
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36946364
Points: 2
# Comments: 0
Listen, I know the title sounds as if I have some sort of issues with my ego, but hear me out. So, my boyfriend (m, 24) and I (f, 22) have been together for over 5 years now.
The 2nd and the 3rd year were extremely toxic and we have thought about breaking up more than once and sometimes also really had done it but just for a few hours. However, we managed to grow through it together and we also obviously became more mature with age. I still think, the reason why we are still together is mainly because I started to accept things, not many girlfriends would have come to terms with and I became super chill over time. I would hardly ever call myself jealous unless I am given good reasons to be.
When we met, he was a little fuckboy if I were to name it. He was loyal to me, but he had a lot of girls before me, he was partying every weekend and was just overall flirty still. When we met, he just turned 19 and I was 16, about to turn 17. Therefore, I was not allowed to visit most of the clubs he went to and he partied without me; which I was fine with. But he always went with a group of girls, 2 of them, who he called extremely beautiful.
He follows them on ig and whenever they posted sth, he would show me and tell me their outfits are amazing, they look bomb etc. And I have to agree. The girls were all literally 10/10s; the girls, every other girl would be jealous of. I like to support other girls and can admit, when one is just perfect. But with time, I grew jealous on them, simply because of his comments and his glorification of them.
There was also one time, where we went shopping and he saw a shirt one of the girls wore and he wanted me to try it on. This was no news, he often asked me to buy outfits similar to them. So I tried it on, but she is probably a xs to a s girl, when I am a m to l girl. It just didnt look good on me. He said „nah now that you are wearing it, I only like it on her“.
There was also a scenario where he would tell me this specific girl (lets call her Zoe) gave him a lapdance when they were out for the night.
One thing about my bf is that he will always be 100% honest with you. Even though you wouldn’t wanna hear it or if it is inappropriate.
Fast forward to now. He has no contact with these girls anymore. I have never gone out of my way and forbid him anything. He should have known himself what is ok within a relationship and what not. So their friendship just got lost over time without any influence on my behalf. But Zoe particulary was always a sensitive topic from there on.
Last friday, we celebrated us moving in together and invited some friends over. We then played piccolo; for those, who don‘t know this app: it‘s simply a sort of truth or dare. The question „for all the taken ones: drink, if your current partner is the best you ever had“ came on. And I drank. Because, he is in my eyes, without a doubt. He looked at me and hesitated. He then said „If I am being honest, Zoe was better in bed“. The friends around us started screaming „ok ok ok please talk about it later…“ He continued „but I know she (me) is fine with it, because it was before us“. I just smiled and we moved on. But after they were gone, I just looked at him and went to bed without another word.
To explain further: there were two times in our relationship, where we had a similar story with me. There was a boy, who I wanted to try friends with benefits with when I was 15. Ive known him since childhood. We kissed and I immediately stopped and said this isnt sth for me. Years later, he worked at a store nearby and I asked to get me a bag out of their sortiment and I visited him on the way to my bf to get the bag. I told my bf and reminded him that there once was a kiss (which I have told him before) and hell broke loose. I have never mentioned it, how he couldn‘t trust me anymore etc.
A little bit later in our relationship, a guy, I have known before, was introduced to our friend group. After some time we talked about old times and we found old chats between us. We once (!) played truth or dare as stupid teenagers and there were some questions rather personal/intimate. It was extremely cringey to read those after all those years; especially since we both had forgot about this. I thought, my bf was in the room with us, when we all laughed hard about this. A few months later we talked about it again and how cringe it was. My bf later said he had never heard of it before and how I could betray him again.
So now, he just said after five years in front of all of our friends that Zoe was better in bed. This was news to me. That they both have ever been intimate. I dont care about what happend before us but I should have known this. Back then he was mad about me telling him (again) about something previous when I just wanted to get a bag. He was mad about some texts as a stupid teenager. When I never made a secret out of both of this.
And then I get to know -5 years into our relationship- that there was something between him and Zoe. As if this was not relevant that he still fucked her a week before we met and continued partying with her. He also emberassed me in front of all of our friends and said within 5 years there has never been a sex better than one out of a few 5 years ago. Plus the whole question wasnt even explicitly about sexpartners.
I am in absolute no mood to have sex with him. We usually have it every day or at least every 2 days. So he has asked me constantly since friday. Yesterday he got mad that I said no again and said „you cant be grumpy forever I already apologized“. Yes he did. But he just doesnt understand that it had an impact on me. I just know if I were to have sex with him I feel like I am competing against Zoe. I feel like I am not good enough.
However, he has apologized and he always says it doesnt matter since he chose me back then. (I dont know if he was even being able to choose her or if he just settled for me but thats just a feeling). So now I am contemplating whether I overreacted, since it was before our relationship and he is in no contact with her since a few years already.
Thanks for reading through this novel.
Article URL: https://simple.wikipedia.org/wiki/Basic_English
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36933869
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
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submitted by /u/NPStudios2004 to r/clevercomebacks [link] [comments] |
Article URL: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barefoot_Gen_(1983_film)
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36923100
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
Article URL: https://www.cnn.com/2023/07/26/americas/laser-mapping-reveals-a-forgotten-maya-city-scn/index.html
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36911347
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36898185
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
Article URL: https://ahmedash.dev/tags/laravel-core-bits/
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36882497
Points: 2
# Comments: 1
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submitted by /u/Existentialidiot83 to r/oddlyspecific [link] [comments] |
Article URL: https://www.thenation.com/article/society/jeffrey-epstein-harvard-summers/
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36852444
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
This question is inspired by me being reminded that I was in my mid 20s before I learned that the fastest train home from London wasn't the one that said Watford on the front. I live in Watford and never really thought about why the train in to London took about 20 minutes, whilst the train out took over an hour. Turns out I always got the slow train back to Watford where Watford was the final destination after about 20 other stops, whilst I got the fast train in where Watford was often the final stop before Euston.
Edit - I have read every single reply to this and here are the most common things that people have posted about not knowing when they were younger:
Raisins are dried grapes.
Reindeer are real.
Ponies are a type of small horse, not a different species.
Any other LLM better than ChatGPT4 for ML work?
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36837971
Points: 1
# Comments: 3
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Messy couples, couples that have weathered storms but just became stronger, couples you were sure were just for PR, etc. Couples that you see and think "I can't believe they're still together!" Both in a "good for them!"-way and "how?"-way [link] [comments] |
Article URL: https://superdeluxeedition.com/news/roger-waters-the-dark-side-of-the-moon-redux/
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36828298
Points: 2
# Comments: 0
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Reddit removed my original post of this because I forgot the year. I found the original pic in all its glory. Yes, my father is a short king. Yes, my mother is an Amazonian woman. [link] [comments] |
My 21F and my sister 30F has a 9M who has asthma which is pretty controlled, anyways my sister is kinda bigoted she’s one of those who believe that vaccines could cause strokes and autism and some stupid BS.
When she took her son about a month ago to the pediatrician he strongly suggest that he take a prophylactic vaccines to avoid any complications of his asthma and my sister refused and said she’s afraid that it would “ cause autism” anyways.
The days went by until 5 days ago my nephew caught a respiratory tract infection and it kept getting worse that lead him to being in a septic shock and had to go to the ICU also his oxygenation saturation was low and condition kept deteriorate.
When i went to the hospital i found her crying so hard after the doctor told her that his prognosis is pretty bad
and it really really pissed me off and said wow you really have the nerve to cry when YOU’RE the one who caused all this with your ignorance and if you followed his pediatrician advice then none of this will happened and if he dies which probably is going to happen based on the doctors opinions there is no one to blame but yourself.
My mom immediately pulled my arm and started yelling at me for being “ insensitive bitch and i was AH for saying such thing in this time” but i believe shes the reason and i didn’t say anything wrong So aitah?
Edit: since many people are asking, the doctor didn’t explicitly said that he is in the icu because he didn’t take his prophylactic vaccines but
“he caught pneumonia and it exaggerated his condition” also part of the prophylactic vaccines for asthmatic patients is pneumonia vaccine so it isn’t really hard to connect the dots.
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submitted by /u/Sonic_the_hedgedog to r/tumblr [link] [comments] |
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submitted by /u/Full_Audience2982 to r/clevercomebacks [link] [comments] |
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submitted by /u/fabioke to r/oddlysatisfying [link] [comments] |
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Sorry for the non existant selfie skills. I context I do office work in Montreal, Canada, as a project manager for a construction company. I usually wear chinos and colorful shirts. Is this too much? [link] [comments] |
Article URL: https://thewalrus.ca/threads-meta/
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36761588
Points: 2
# Comments: 0
I am a stay-at-home father of 2. My wife has a great job and with the cost of daycare it just makes sense that I stay home. I follow a lot of stay-at-home parenting pages, and it's the same song-and-dance over and over. How being a stay-at-home Parent isn't respected and just how hard the job is. Mostly women calling themselves super heroes for watching the kids. Well, I hate to break it to you, but it's the easiest job I've ever had
I love my kids and getting to hang out with them all day is awesome. When we are not doing errands or appointments I take them to the park and to the museum and to the library. I research and cook awesome meals in my smoker and on my grill for my wife. I play with the dog and I take them hiking. I really think anyone who thinks it's such a hard job is full of it
Edit: Damn some of you sad folks are so salty! I pray you can find a happy and healthy relationship some day!
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submitted by /u/VariousBasket125 to r/therewasanattempt [link] [comments] |
Article URL: https://news.mongabay.com/2023/07/rattlesnakes-can-calm-down-their-friends-study-shows/
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36739172
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
Article URL: https://every.to/chain-of-thought/the-optimal-level-of-optimization
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36727343
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
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submitted by /u/TLP34 to r/whatisthisthing [link] [comments] |
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submitted by /u/Sufficient-Bug-9112 to r/TikTokCringe [link] [comments] |
Every few days I see a post about a woman, usually between the ages of 18-25, in a relationship with a man 10-20 years older and nearly ALL the replies say the exact same thing. He's a predator, he's creepy, she's just a baby, she's a child, he's manipulating her, she's being taken advantage of, etc.
I've never understood this and have always felt that it's hugely sexist and disrespectful to women. Over 18 is an adult. Assuming that she doesn't know what she's doing and that the older man is a creep and is preying on her is taking away her agency as an adult to make her own decisions. Many will say, "it's legal, but it's creepy", which just further serves to insult the woman as an immature person who can't make decisions for herself.
Society needs to stop shaming adults' decisions of who to date. It's unusual, yes. It's uncommon, yes. But it's not abnormal, it's not creepy and it if someone is taking advantage of the other, age isn't the reason. I've personally seen large age gap relationships and most of the time, they are just two people who like each other's company. And in the cases where one was manipulating or using the other, guess what, it was more often the younger one doing so, not the older one. That's just what I've seen, though.
And as for "what on earth would they have to talk about?" Huh, well, maybe the same things people of similar ages talk about???
I don't know about y'all, but most of the conversations I have with people my age revolve around hobbies, music, movies and tv, daily events, news, politics, something I recently learned, personal problems, professional problems, etc. I have friends that range from 15 years younger than me to 20 years older than me and we never seem to have a problem finding things to talk about and relate about.
Levels of maturity? ha! I've met just as many immature women in their 30's, 40's and 50's as I have in their 20's. Clingy, emotionally stunted, constant crying over stupid things, inability to be responsible and pay bills on time or be respectful to others, etc... this is not the exclusive domain of young people.
Of course, there are general differences for different generations but that is not necessarily a bad thing. One can learn from the other.
Really, it comes down to compatibility. If you have a 40 year old man that loves to go to raves and has a playlist full of edm music, then him dating a 40 year old woman who just wants to sit at home and drink wine while sitting in front of the tv and complaining about politics is way more weird than if he were to date a 20-something who loves the same music and activities. (Simplified example, but the point should be clear.)
For the record, this all applies to younger men and older women too, but in general people are a lot less critical of that -- which just furthers the point that criticizing young women dating older men IS sexist.
Article URL: https://dope.bearblog.dev/retro-on-working-web3/
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36698864
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
Article URL: https://www.nytimes.com/2023/07/11/technology/anthropic-ai-claude-chatbot.html
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36698845
Points: 2
# Comments: 0
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submitted by /u/neiono to r/WhitePeopleTwitter [link] [comments] |
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36685004
Points: 1
# Comments: 1
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Edit: Thank you for all the questions - will be back soon to reply some more :) [link] [comments] |
Article URL: https://seths.blog/2023/07/sufficient-resolution/
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36670384
Points: 3
# Comments: 1
Article URL: https://hastie.su.domains/ISLP/ISLP_website.pdf
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36657112
Points: 3
# Comments: 0
Article URL: https://www.fmkorea.com/5948896038
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36647004
Points: 1
# Comments: 1
Every other door dash I’ve ever ordered, they put the food on my welcome mat. This time, they oddly left it on the porch about 10 feet from the front door. I have an obviously placed ring camera, and my concern is that they did this on purpose to avoid being captured on camera.
Then, they sat in their car with the lights on and running in front of my house for AN HOUR. Keep in mind this is at 10pm. I was too scared to go out and even get my food because I thought the whole situation was sketchy. I called DoorDash to see if they could do anything but they just said they would put in an incident report and denied any refund or anything.
What do you make of this? Am I just overreacting? I am not overreacting. I’m probably not going to order anymore after this.
I did consider calling the non-emergency police line, but was trying hard not to bother them. I opted to stay on the phone with a family member instead.
And not that it matters, but I did tip 25%.
Article URL: https://twitter.com/OpenAI/status/1677015057316872192
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36620434
Points: 3
# Comments: 1
Article URL: https://www.math.mcgill.ca/barr/papers/pga.pdf
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36604203
Points: 3
# Comments: 0
Article URL: https://gitea.it/scaglio/LTO9-Optimizer
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36590791
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
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submitted by /u/AccurateInteract to r/facepalm [link] [comments] |
Article URL: https://www.tsa.gov/travel/security-screening/whatcanibring/items/harry-potter-wand
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36576982
Points: 3
# Comments: 1
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submitted by /u/MarketBuzz2021 to r/therewasanattempt [link] [comments] |
Article URL: https://www.popehat.com/2015/05/21/happy-to-be-here/
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36564242
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
Article URL: https://www.phoronix.com/news/MSM-Adreno-700-Series
Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36552992
Points: 1
# Comments: 0
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submitted by /u/GreenGazelle7 to r/facepalm [link] [comments] |
![[Bleacher Report] Report: Damian Lillard 'Just Wouldn't Report' If He's Traded to Team That Isn't Heat](https://external-preview.redd.it/mlSbkltg2JJGCrT7y7enrdgTTTSKFWFUp-WnHSPpZw0.jpg?width=640&crop=smart&auto=webp&s=65223622dcd21295ccd531a212042f674cde82f8 "[Bleacher Report] Report: Damian Lillard 'Just Wouldn't Report' If He's Traded to Team That Isn't Heat")
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