Friday, January 31, 2020

Explore: Project Euler 001 the Hard Way

Article URL: https://statagroup.com/articles/explore

Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22207335

Points: 1

# Comments: 0



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Show HN: Portfolio Analytics for Individual Investors

Article URL: https://useilluminate.com/

Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22207253

Points: 2

# Comments: 1



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Man on a deserted island (Long)

A man has been stranded on an island for 10 years, when one day, a beautiful woman emerges out of the sea in a wetsuit. "How long has it been since you've had a beer?" she asks. "10 years" says the man. She unzips one of her pockets to reveal a bottle of beer. He drinks it and says "Man, that's good!" She than asks "How long has it been since you've had a cigarette?" "10 years!" says the man. She unzips her other pocket and ands him a cigarette. He lights it and smokes it. She then starts unzipping the main zipper of her wetsuit saying "And how long has it been since you've had some real fun?" to which the man replies "Woah! Don't tell me you have a jet ski in there!"

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theres something suspicious about the location of the g-spot

i just cant quite put my finger on it

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The Uber driver who drove me home from work yesterday was waiting outside of my work today

Edit: 30... Thirty... I'm 30. I should have just used the numbers in the first place, reading comprehension is hard I know... I am an adult, not thirteen. Also while I'm here, huge shoutout to the guy who called me "a drama queen with a blind eye", I kind of loved it, thank you.

As a contextual thing, I take a lot of Ubers because I am functionally blind in one eye and the lack of depth perception causes me to be unable to drive.

This guy was my Uber driver home from work yesterday morning (I work nights). He told me that I looked to be about the same age as him and I laughed as he looked to be in his mid-forties and I am having my thirtieth birthday in a couple of weeks, but he seemed surprised when I told him my age and made a joke about "there goes my five stars". That was slightly awkward but no big deal, I gave him the same five stars I give to every Uber driver who doesn't act like an enormous asshole. But then he drove me home again this morning.

At first I thought that he was just in his usual area or what have you, but this man felt perfectly comfortable with telling me that he had pulled into the parking lot and had waited for ten minutes for me to come out and order an Uber. What the unholy fuck?! So I'm already uncomfortable.

He asked me what I do on the weekends and I told him that that's when I spend my time with my friends. He then asked me whether I wanted one more friend, a question that I tried to dodge the pointed intention of by saying something like "haha, it's always good to have friends". But he told me that he "was interested in getting to know me" anyway and that's why he was waiting outside my work today. Said he likes how my laugh sounds.

Then he started regaling me with sad tales of his personal life, including his mother's cancer. This was actually a slight improvement because it wasn't about me at all.

THEN, when he dropped me off he pointedly asked "so how do I get in touch with you outside of (place I work in)?". I was stunned into silence and he followed up with a standard sad-toned "I don't?". I basically told him that I didn't feel comfortable with that as I don't know him at all, got out of the car and didn't look back.

This is crazy. How does this complete stranger think that ANY ONE ELEMENT of this is even remotely appropriate? Just because a woman is friendly and smiles at you is no excuse to literally STALK HER outside of her job and push your company on her. I feel disgusted by the very idea that this guy may well be in that parking lot again on Monday morning and I will not be entering his vehicle ever again. If you ever need more evidence to not give these people your full address, you never know when someone may just decide to wait where they know you'll be.

submitted by /u/SugarCanKissMyAss to r/TwoXChromosomes
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 The Uber driver who drove me home from work yesterday was waiting outside of my work today

Thursday, January 30, 2020

Improvisational Productivity

Article URL: https://dcgross.com/improvising-for-productivity/

Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22197618

Points: 1

# Comments: 0



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Escheat Show

Article URL: https://www.npr.org/2020/01/24/799345159/episode-967-escheat-show

Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22197608

Points: 1

# Comments: 0



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A duck walks into a pub and orders a pint of beer and a ham sandwich.

The barman looks at him and says, “Hang on! You’re a duck.” “Yep,” replies the duck. “And you can talk!” exclaims the barman.

“Yep again”, says the duck, “Now if you don’t mind, can I have my beer and my sandwich please?” “Certainly, sorry about that”, says the barman as he pulls the duck’s pint. “It’s just we don’t get many ducks in this pub. What are you doing round this way?” “I’m working on the building site across the road,” explains the duck. “I’m a plasterer.”

The flabbergasted barman cannot believe the duck and wants to learn more, but takes the hint when the duck pulls out a newspaper from his bag and proceeds to read it. So, the duck reads his paper, drinks his beer, eats his sandwich, bids the barman good day and leaves. The same thing happens for two weeks. Then one day the circus comes to town. The ringmaster comes into the pub for a pint and the barman says to him, “You’re with the circus, aren’t you? Well, I know this duck that could be just brilliant in your circus. He talks, drinks beer, eats sandwiches, reads the newspaper and everything!”

“Sounds marvelous,” says the ringmaster, handing over his business card. “Get him to give me a call.” So the next day when the duck comes into the pub the barman says, “Hey Mr. Duck, I reckon I can line you up with a top job, paying really good money.” “I’m always looking for the next job,” Says the duck. “Where is it?” “At the circus,” Says the barman. “The circus?” Repeats the duck. “That’s right,” replies the barman. “The circus?” The duck asks again, “with the big tent?” “Yeah,” the barman replies. “With all the animals who live in cages, and performers who live in caravans?” says the duck.

“Of course,” the barman replies. “And the tent has canvas sides and a big canvas roof with a hole in the middle?” persists the duck. “That’s right!” says the barman. The duck shakes his head in amazement, and says …….
“What would they want with a plasterer?”

submitted by /u/ksbalaji
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Fizzlefade (2017)

Article URL: http://fabiensanglard.net/fizzlefade/index.php

Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22197557

Points: 1

# Comments: 0



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Corona Virus

Corona Virus submitted by /u/DwideSchrude47 to r/funny
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 Corona Virus

Thanks, I hate sans serif

Thanks, I hate sans serif submitted by /u/Auctorion to r/TIHI
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 Thanks, I hate sans serif

Wednesday, January 29, 2020

Nuclear Matters

Article URL: https://www.nuclearmatters.com/

Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22187570

Points: 1

# Comments: 0



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A mailman notices a mailbox with the flag up

So, he opens the box and picks up the letter. He glances at it briefly to make sure it is stamped, and then puts it in his bag with his other letters. When he gets back to his office, the letter goes in a big bin with all of the other out-going mail. He thinks nothing of it, and finishes his day.

A few days later, he delivers the exact same letter to the same house that he picked it up from. He glances at the mailing address and observes that it is indeed the same as the return address. Anyone can make a mistake, so the mailman puts the letter in the mailbox so that the customer can readdress it for its proper recipient. He thinks nothing of it and finishes his day.

The next day, the mailman sees the same mailbox with the flag up. He opens the box and again sees the same letter, nothing changed, but with a new stamp on it. The mailman is perplexed, and thinking to save the customer both time and money, decides to ring the doorbell and inquire about the letter.

Ding-dong, ding-dong. Ding-dong, ding-dong. Ding-dong, Ding-dong.

The door opens and standing there is a stout Buddhist monk, dressed in traditional garb.

“Pardon me, sir,” the mailman says, “but you seem to be trying to mail this letter again, and without any changes to the address, it’s only going to end up back at your home in a few days.”

“Ah, my letter. Thank you so much for mailing it the other day, it was greatly appreciated. Please do so again” replies the Buddhist monk.

“But sir,” says mailman, “you will only waste a stamp, and this letter will be re-delivered to your home a few days from now.”

“But that is my intention, dear man,” replies the Buddhist monk. “You see, reposting is the best way to get karma.”

submitted by /u/JohnDoodalwood
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The curious customer

A guy stuck his head into a barbershop and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut?" The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said, "About 2 hours." The guy left.

A few days later, the same guy stuck his head in the door and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut?" The barber looked around at the shop and said, "About 3 hours." The guy left.

A week later, the same guy stuck his head in the shop and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut?" The barber looked around the shop and said, "About an hour and a half." The guy left.

The barber turned to his friend and said, "Hey, Bob, do me a favor, follow him and see where he goes. He keeps asking how long he has to wait for a haircut, but he never comes back." A little while later, Bob returned to the shop, laughing hysterically.

The barber asked, "So, where does he go when he leaves?" Bob looked up, wiped the tears from his eyes and said, "Your house!"

submitted by /u/niranjan23d
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Xkcd: 4.5 Degrees

Article URL: https://xkcd.com/1379/

Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22175758

Points: 3

# Comments: 0



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Ask HN: How do you process payments?

This is how YOU have chosen to do it. Let us know if it is physical or virtual.

I found an old post from 2009 about this, wondering what the answers will be a decade later : https://ift.tt/2vnLEmm


Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22175695

Points: 2

# Comments: 1



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Pretending aye?

Pretending aye? submitted by /u/sean_mca1 to r/ScottishPeopleTwitter
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 Pretending aye?

Wow

Wow submitted by /u/iZyPa to r/insanepeoplefacebook
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 Wow

A dad was depressed, so he went to the liquor store

He bought some whiskey, and tequila

When he got home, he set them on the table

His son immediately picked up both bottles

The dad asks "What are you doing?!"

The son responds "You were sad, so I'm lifting your spirits"

submitted by /u/Areeyar
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A general noticed one of his soldiers behaving oddly.

The soldier would pick up any piece of paper he found, frown and say: “That's not it” and put it down again. This went on for some time until the general arranged to have the soldier psychologically tested. The psychologist concluded that the soldier was deranged, and wrote out his discharge from the army. The soldier picked it up, smiled and said: “That's it.”

submitted by /u/RayInRed
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Monday, January 27, 2020

Ask HN: Why is there no built-in authenticator app in iOS or Android?

2FA via SMS is known to be flawed, yet it is by far the most common method. I think more sites would offer 2FA via authenticator apps if they didn't have to ask you to download a third-party app.


Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22165290

Points: 1

# Comments: 0



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9to5cult Newsletter

Article URL: https://www.9to5cult.com/

Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22165231

Points: 1

# Comments: 0



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VirtualBox

Article URL: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/VirtualBox

Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22165188

Points: 1

# Comments: 0



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Ask HN: What's with all the unpaid interview projects?

From the smallest startup, to Google, almost everyone I've ever interviewed with has required unpaid project work.

I rarely, if ever, get feedback on these projects. In later rounds, it's obvious most interviewers haven't seen the project or even know you did it.

Why is software engineering the only industry I'm aware of that requires you to prove that you know how to do things you've been doing for years and years? Your projects on Github, degree in your field, and resume don't matter and are rarely discussed.

Unpaid projects, over and over.

Companies are too lazy to do their own work and we are all getting screwed.

How many hours of free work have you had to do, only to get ghosted, denied without feedback, or see your work turn up in their product later?

It isn't that hard of a problem to fix: stop being cheap and pay people for their time.

"But we can't afford it..." - nonsense! Esp. big companies. Poppycock.

If it's "too expensive", you need to have a better funnel upfront before the project stage.

Properly compensating for interviews would be a huge differentiator for recruiting.

Great engineer A: "I interviewed at Company X, and didn't get it. But they paid me $1000 for a day's work. It was pretty cool."

"Rockstar" engineer B: "Wow, that sounds neat. Too bad you didn't get it!" (Maybe I'll interview there too...)

vs. ill-will from unpaid

Great engineer a: "Yeah I interviewed with company X and they made me do a 3 day unpaid project. I didn't get any feedback and they made me do a technical interview AFTER I had already submitted the project, where they just asked unrelated trivia. One line rejection e-mail."

"Rockstar" engineer B: "Yeah that sucks. They sound awful. You dodged a bullet" (continues working where they are)

If I do work for you, pay me for it. If I do work for you, give me feedback. If I do work for you, respect my time.


Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22165155

Points: 4

# Comments: 1



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Ask HN: Is Google Down?

I can't seem to access any Google website.

Is this something local to my network?


Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22165148

Points: 1

# Comments: 1



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best friend assurance.

best friend assurance. submitted by /u/esberat to r/Unexpected
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 best friend assurance.

What is the deal with Brie Larson and Captain Marvel again?

How come people seem to hate her so, has she done anything or is her mer existence in this character offensive to some people? Captain Marvel Petition

submitted by /u/Father-Of-Marxism to r/OutOfTheLoop
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 What is the deal with Brie Larson and Captain Marvel again?

Cheat codes [OC]

Cheat codes [OC] submitted by /u/diegodrawsbutts to r/comics
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 Cheat codes [OC]

This guy Bill has been having headaches for about 40 years..

...he doesnt know what to do so he finally goes to a doctor for the pain. The doctor checks him and says "bill I’m not sure how to tell you this , but you have a very rare condition where your balls press up against your spine and put pressure on your head. That’s why you've been getting these headaches" Bill shocked and scared asks the doctor "what should i do doc" Doctor sighs and tells Bill "im sorry only thing we can do is castrate you" . Bill is shocked , he shudders at the thought of getting his balls cut off . He tells the doctor he’ll think about it and leaves. He thinks about it for sometime and finally after working up the courage he goes back to the doc and agrees to do the procedure . Finally after a long long painful surgery Bill walks out a new man. He walks around for the first time without his balls and tries not to think about his loss. He walks around and passes by a suit store he tells himself 'I am a new man today!...let me buy my new self some clothes” . He goes in and asks the owner "sir can u get me a blazer" the owner looks at him and says "one blazer coming up size 13" bill is amazed that the guy was able to tell his size by just looking at him and says "damn how'd u know" the owner answers "been in the business 50 years" bill tells him “ ok then let me get pants" the owner says "one pair of pants coming up size 35 waist" again bill is amazed he asks the guy "how did u know?" .."been in the business 50 yrs i know it all" Bill still surprised asks him "how about a pair of underwear" the owner looks at him and says "one pair of underwear size 10 coming up" bill jumps up and says "ha you were wrong im a size 8 been wearing 8 for 40 years " the owner looks at him concerned and retorts”well you shouldnt have ....8 is too small ,it will make your balls press up against your spine and give you a crazy headache".

submitted by /u/bigtrunkydarnold
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A teacher just started working at a new school

During recess he sees a boy smoking in the corner and decides to walk up to him.

He says to the boy "how would your mother feel when she saw this?"

The boy answered "I think she would be very glad."

"Oh and why is that?" Asked the teacher.

To which the boy replied "because she's blind."

submitted by /u/patrickdm1998
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I asked my North Korean friend what it's like living over there

He said "can't complain"

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Sunday, January 26, 2020

Learning lit-HTML part 3: Event listeners

Article URL: https://terodox.tech/lit-html-part-3/

Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22155958

Points: 1

# Comments: 0



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Climate Assembly UK

Article URL: https://www.climateassembly.uk/

Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22155936

Points: 1

# Comments: 0



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Meta-Advice

Article URL: https://mlu.red/55228366310.html

Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22155858

Points: 1

# Comments: 0



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Alfalfa Club

Article URL: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alfalfa_Club

Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22155761

Points: 1

# Comments: 0



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Ask HN: How do you implement visitor-to-signup tracking in your app?

This is surprisingly difficult to solve in 2020. The biggest issue is (in Google Analytics) how to separate traffic that could potentially sign up for a trial vs. traffic from people who’ve already signed up.

Here’s one way to do it:

1. When someone logs in to your app set a cookie

2. If they visit your homepage later check for cookie

3. If cookie exists put them in a Google Analytics segment called eg “existing users”

4. Create view in GA that excludes users in “existing users” segment. View Trial signups goal in this view.

It seems like this should be simpler. If there are other approaches that work I’d love to hear them!


Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22155734

Points: 2

# Comments: 0



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Ask HN: Can anybody recommend a website creator for a novice

I have a friend who wants to create a website for his new business. It basically needs to be just the equivalent of a business card. i.e. some info about the business and contact info.

Could anybody recommend a tool to do this with minimal effort.


Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22155723

Points: 1

# Comments: 1



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The IRS decides to audit Grandpa, and summons him to the IRS office. The auditor was not surprised when Grandpa showed up with his attorney.

The IRS decides to audit Grandpa, and summons him to the IRS office. The auditor was not surprised when Grandpa showed up with his attorney.

The auditor said, "Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, Which you explain by saying that you win money gambling. I'm not sure the IRS finds that believable."

"I'm a great gambler, and I can prove it," says Grandpa. "How about a demonstration?"

The auditor thinks for a moment and said, "Okay. Go ahead."

Grandpa says, "I'll bet you a thousand dollars that I can bite my own eye."

The auditor thinks a moment and says, "It's a bet."

Grandpa removes his glass eye and bites it. The auditor's jaw drops.

Grandpa says, "Now, I'll bet you two thousand dollars that I can bite my other eye."

Now the auditor can tell Grandpa isn't blind, so he takes the bet. Grandpa removes his dentures and bites his good eye.

The stunned auditor now realizes he has wagered and lost three grand, with Grandpa's attorney as a witness. He starts to get nervous.

"Want to go double or nothing?" Grandpa asks. "I'll bet you six thousand dollars that I can stand on one side of your desk, and pee into that wastebasket on the other side, and never get a drop anywhere in between."

The auditor, twice burned, is cautious now, but he looks carefully and decides there's no way this old guy could possibly manage that stunt, so he agrees again.

Grandpa stands beside the desk and unzips his pants, but although he strains mightily, he can't make the stream reach the wastebasket on the other side, so he ends up urinating all over the auditor's desk.

The auditor leaps with joy, realizing that he has just turned a major loss into a huge win. But Grandpa's own attorney moans and puts his head in his hands.

"Are you okay?" the auditor asks.

"Not really," says the attorney. "This morning, when Grandpa told me he'd been summoned for an audit, he bet me twenty-five thousand dollars that he could come in here and pee all over your desk and that you'd be happy about it!"

submitted by /u/alonlyharddrive
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Pregnancy..

My brother’s wife has been pregnant for five months and decided that they wanted to reveal the gender of the baby at our family reunion of about 40 people.

One night, after just finishing up a BBQ, my brother and his wife stand up and announce to the family that they are going to have a little baby girl.

Everyone starts cheering, naturally. Once the cheers die down a little I shout out, “Do you have a name for the baby yet?

”My brother replies, “Yeah. Liana Noelle. ”Everyone starts to “Ooohhh” and “Ahhhh” and proclaim how pretty of a name it is.

Then after a moment I shout, “How the hell are you supposed to spell Liana with no L?”

submitted by /u/jflipside
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Saturday, January 25, 2020

No Use of News

Article URL: https://almanack.substack.com/p/no-use-of-news

Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22149560

Points: 1

# Comments: 0



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Cynthia Solomon: Logo History

Article URL: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7bbmaSOeQGc

Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22149552

Points: 1

# Comments: 0



from Hacker News: Newest https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7bbmaSOeQGc

2020 Predictions

Article URL: https://www.profgalloway.com/2020-predictions

Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22149526

Points: 1

# Comments: 0



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Ask HN: Is there a demand for a form builder that stores data in Google Sheets?

I have been toying with this idea for quite some team. Simply put, its an online form builder that automatically posts data to Google Sheets. Users will be able to create forms and put them directly in their websites. The forms will post data to the server via an API, the server will validate the data, and save it in Google Sheets. Does this sound useful to anyone?


Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22149521

Points: 3

# Comments: 0



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How would you double $100 in a month?

Imagine you have $100 and you need to double it in a month. What would you do? How would you replicate it again with $200,$400,800,$1600 and etc.?


Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22149460

Points: 2

# Comments: 1



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New (MD5) Hash=Password Plaintext Lookup Service

Article URL: http://crackfoo.net/

Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22149417

Points: 1

# Comments: 1



from Hacker News: Newest http://crackfoo.net/

The man who invented Velcro has died.

RIP

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Pretty impressive..

Pretty impressive.. submitted by /u/sall0r to r/gifs
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 Pretty impressive..

Kawhi Throwing Trip Dubs at the Club

submitted by /u/nabs123 to r/nba
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 Kawhi Throwing Trip Dubs at the Club